What is bullying?

Bullying is when you harm someone or make them feel small and/or sad over and over again. 

There are many types of bullying, physical which involves actual violence, Verbal which involves using harmful words and cyber which involves sending harmful messages. 

Here are some tips to help cope with the effect of bullying from young people in Kirklees:

  • Tell a teacher, parent or someone you trust. It’s so important to get the support from them and to make sure other people are aware of what's happening. A lot of times when teachers don't act on a bulling complaints it is due to lack of evidence. A good way to combat this is by creating a diary of each incident. If your friends have seen the bullying get them to report it to a teacher as well. This way it will be hard for them to ignore the problem.
  • Stay in an area where you know a teacher is, this way you may be able to get them caught red handed!
  • It is best to stay calm during the situation and ignore the bully. Often a bully will bully someone because they like seeing them upset. If you don't react they may get bored and stop. However, if the bullying continues it can be useful to stand up for yourself. Although you will need to be careful when taking this approach because you don't want to get yourself in trouble by becoming as bad as the bully.
  • Show a bully you won’t be pushed around as long as you stay defensive and don't take it too far you should be ok.
  • Bully's may pick on someone they believe to be weaker so if you show them that you’re not they should stop. I know its hard not to be yourself but put on an act!
  • Make sure you let the bully know that your confident in yourself (even if you don't feel it) regardless of they think. Their opinion doesn't matter to you. In the end if they have to make someone feel small in order to make them self-feel big or if they are completely unable to empathise then that's pretty sad on their part and they won’t go far with that attitude.
  • You should remind yourself that anything a bully says isn't worth listening to. As long as you are happy with who you are it shouldn't matter that they think. Usually a bully is a very unhappy person.
  • Try to stay with friends for safety in numbers they will be able to help with moral support and will be there to stick up for you. Also bullying is very stressful and keeping it bottled up will only make it worse, so by telling a friend or someone you trust about what's happening will help you lift a weight of your shoulders and it’s always nice to have someone on your side as it may make you feel very lonely.
  • Often if you get a parent or guardian to complain it is taken more seriously and if it still isn't dealt with it can be taken further to people higher up in authority. Take a look at the schools website it should have a behaviour policy on there.
  • If a bully threatened you not to tell anyone or you’ll get hurt ignore them.  You should tell someone so that you are safer than you would be alone.
  • Remember you shouldn't change yourself due to bullying as that lets the bully win.
  • Bullying can make you feel lonely, lose confidence and feel nervous. It’s important to remember that you’re not alone and there's always someone who will help be it friends, parents, teachers, bullying websites etc.
  • There are lots of websites and helplines set up to help and give advice to those affected by bulling if you don't want to tell someone you know.
  • It won’t last forever.
  • Cyber bullying is just as harmful as physical and emotional bullying, it is often best to report and block them to prevent this getting out of hand.

What is peer pressure?

Peer pressure is when you feel you have to do something because the people around you or your friends all do it.

  • Peer pressure is often used to try to get you to do something you don't want to do. This can be anything from peers trying you get you to go somewhere you don't want to, to try smoking or maybe to dictate what you wear. Everyone is unique and individual. It isn't fair for someone to try to pressure you into doing something you don't want. You shouldn't listen. Often they may be trying to get you to do the wrong thing which could get you into trouble or drastically effect your lives (such as convincing you to smoke) therefore if you mark the right choice you will do better for yourself in the future.
  • You shouldn't let others influence how you dress or what you do because it’s your life. Its important in life to learn to respect other people’s opinions and individuality, as it would be a pretty boring place if we were all the same!
  • True friends should accept you for who you are and not who they want you to be.
  • You could be worried that if you don't do what they do you will be left out or become an outsider. But good friends will accept you for your differences and uniqueness and there will always be someone in a similar situation who can help.
  • It doesn't make you a chicken to go against what they may want you to do as it is harder to say no than to just go along with it. It is common to feel pulled between two choices and lost at what to do when your friends and the people you trust want you to do something you’re just not sure is you. You may feel uncomfortable making YOUR choice but in the end you have to make the choice that benefits you and not them.

Here are some videos